Jessie J revealed she has been ‘changed forever’ as she opened up about her devastating miscarriage.
The Who You Are singer, 33, shared her tragic news that she had lost her baby last month, recalling the moment she was told there was no longer a heartbeat.
She spoke of her loss on Instagram in a heartfelt post, explaining that she would still be performing in LA later that day, as singing would help her heal.
In a new message to fans, she explained that she hadn’t processed any of her feelings when she decided to announce the news.
‘I posted about losing my baby just hours after I was told. I reacted in work mode. It’s safe to say I sometimes pour more energy into creating a unhealthy process of my own pain in front of a camera, than I do acknowledging it behind one in real time. “The show must go on” mentality reacted before the human in me did,’ she began a lengthy caption.
‘I must justify to the audience for my show tomorrow, and explain to the world why I might be a little off, was my first thought. I must turn this into a inspirational, I know I will be ok, strong moment, because that’s who I am right?
‘Truth is, I just needed to f**king cry and fall into someone’s arms and sob. But at the time I was alone. I hadn’t processed anything. Nor did I have any idea what I was about to go through not just emotionally but physically after this show.’
‘I truly now understand why women so often talk about the want and need for miscarriage to be openly spoken about more,’ she continued. ‘As I have learnt now that what people know of miscarriage to be (including myself before this past 2 weeks) unless you have personally experienced it. What people think it is, is in fact not a true reflection of what it really is at all. How can people support when they don’t know?
‘I have never experienced pain and trauma or felt loneliness like it. This has changed me forever. In the most, heartbreaking, but beautiful way. It’s put life into perspective in a way nothing else ever has.
‘I am so sorry if you have ever been through it alone or with a loving partner, or are going through it right now at any stage of pregnancy. Losing your baby is one of the worst feelings in the world.
‘I ache for you. If I could I would bring you food, hold you through the physical pain, I know that’s needed more than a “stay strong” text right now.’
‘I guess I’m here to say to anyone who may not have been told this, you are allowed to be broken,’ she concluded the post.
‘You are allowed to cry. Allowed to be weak. Allowed to be exhausted from the pain and the bleeding and the grief that barely has space to exist. You are allowed to do this however YOU need to.
‘Sometimes life just calls us to be human. We know there will be sunshine, but we can’t avoid the rain.’
Jessie was previously told she couldn’t have children, and spoke of her miscarriage in a lengthy Instagram post shortly before she was due to go on stage, which has now been taken down.
Alongside the now-deleted picture, which showed her with a pregnancy test, she explained that she was ‘dreading’ the thought of performing for the crowd.
‘After going for my 3rd scan and being told there was no longer a heartbeat,’ she said. ‘This morning. I feel like I have no control of my emotions. I may regret posting this. I may not. I actually don’t know.’
‘To get pregnant was a miracle in itself and an experience I will never forget and I know I will have again.
‘Im still in shock, the sadness is overwhelming. But I know I am strong, and I know I will be ok.
‘I also know millions of women all over the world have felt this pain and way worse. I feel connected to those of you I know and those of you I don’t.
‘It’s the loneliest feeling in the world [sic].’
Following the post, the Price Tag star was praised by many for speaking out about her own experience, and making others who have been through similar issues ‘less alone’.
A spokesperson for the Miscarriage Association told Metro.co.uk: ‘We’re so sorry to read about Jessie J’s miscarriage and the loss of her much-wanted baby – such devastating news, just when she had been thinking of announcing her pregnancy.
‘We hope that she finds some comfort in the many messages of support posted online and also, perhaps, in the knowledge that by sharing her experience, she will have made others feel less alone.’
Pregnancy loss helpline
For emotional support, you can contact Miscarriage Association’s pregnancy loss helpline on 01924 200799 or email [email protected]
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