Kanye West Isn't Headlining Coachella, But Childish Gambino, Ariana Grande, And Tame Impala Are

When Beyonce’ slayed the hell out of Coachella last year she solidified herself as one of the best to ever hit the stage. Kanye West was probably at home watching her performance like, “That ain’t shit,” and immediately began stalking Goldenvoice, the festival’s producer, to be a headliner for 2019. And though they have been in talks up until now Kanye will not be performing for one main reason; the size of the stage was too small for him. Size queen.

TMZ reports that negotiations between Goldenvoice and Kanye fell apart because of this issue. Kanye has become accustomed to Las Vegas-worthy productions with floating stages and flashing lights and shit. He took one look at the standard 40×60 foot stage and clutched his pearls in disapproval. How dare they give him such a tiny space to perform because how are he AND his ego gonna fit on there?

Multiple sources tell us, the sticking point was the stage. Kanye made it clear he wouldn’t perform on a traditional 60×40 foot stage because it was “artistically limiting.” Goldenvoice, which produces the festival, would not allow the stage to be altered or removed for Ye’s performance. In the end, we’re told Kanye passed.

As one source put it, “These 40×60 stages are so archaic. It’s the same type of stage on which Shakespeare’s works were performed hundreds of years ago.”

Goldenvoice also decided that they didn’t want to make any alterations to the stage that may have disrupted other performers’ sets so ultimately this union was doomed from the start. This doesn’t surprise me at all, though. I saw Kanye perform years ago in Tokyo early in his career. He had a whole meltdown onstage because the music was messed up and he couldn’t hear himself in his monitors. My friends and I looked at each other like, “Somebody come get this bitch,” so I can only imagine how his behavior has multiplied since that time, because this was back when he was the old Kanye.

Coachella should count their blessings. They clearly dodged a bullet here. Plus, they have a plethora of other performers ready to hit that tiny stage and work it like it’s their job (because it is their job). Coachella, which takes place during the weekends of April 12-14 and April 19-21, officially released the roster for the festival to their Instagram. Passes (ranging from the price of one of your healthiest internal organs to a newborn baby) for Molly’d Up Hipsters Hella go on sale tomorrow.

I know that writing is tiny as hell but some of the other acts set to perform at the festival are Janelle Monae, 1975, Kid Cudi, CHVRCHES, Solange, Los Tucanes de Tijuana, Jaden Smith (???), and South Korean girl group BlackpinkIdris Elba will serve as DJ on both Saturdays and the headliners for each night are Childish Gambino, Tame Impala and Ariana Grande.

But it almost seems unfair that Kanye won’t be a part of Coachella since damn near everyone else is. However it’s for the best since he would probably spend the time prior to his set backstage on Twitter making fun of everyone else’s performances. Who am I kidding, he’ll still do that anyway.

Pics: Wenn, BBC


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