It’s almost a year since Kelsey Parker said goodbye to her husband, The Wanted frontman Tom Parker, who tragically died at the age of 33. And in an exclusive interview with new, Kelsey, 32, says grief is “so much bigger” than she ever thought it was.
Tom died in March last year after an 18-month battle with glioblastoma brain cancer, leaving his wife and their two children, Aurelia, three, and Bodhi, two.
Speaking at the Dirty Dancing premiere at London’s Dominion Theatre, Kelsey tells us how she’s coping ahead of the one-year anniversary of Tom’s death. “I’m just taking each day and living through it really,” she says.
Kelsey, who joined a five-day trek across the Sahara Desert in November to raise funds for breast cancer awareness charity CoppaFeel!, has fronted a six-part documentary on her life after her husband’s death.
“Tom called us the Positive Parkers and I really hope our optimism shines through because life is for living and we’re here, we’re doing it and I just want to keep moving forward,” she said when she dedicated the documentary to him.
Here, Kelsey tells us about her relationship with grief and what she gained from facing her fear of talking about her emotions…
Hi, Kelsey, how are you doing?
I’m just taking each day and live through it really. It’s tough, but you’ve just got to get through it.
Will you do anything to mark the anniversary of Tom’s passing?
I don’t know yet. I don’t want to think about it right now, but I’m sure I’ll do something.
How are the kids?
They’re alright – they’re OK. It’s hard.
Siva is doing Dancing On Ice. Will you go and watch him?
Definitely. I can’t wait to see him. I saw him in the first week when he was on TV and the kids watched it, and I said, “There’s uncle Siv on the TV.” I’d like to take Aurelia because she’s that little bit older and she’d enjoy it.
Do you think Siva has the potential to win?
I do, because he’s progressed, even from training.
Would you ever sign up to Dancing On Ice?
Dancing On Ice actually really scares me because I’d fear losing my fingers. That’s what I’d be worried about. And also there’s dancing, but then Dancing On Ice is a totally different story. Hats off to anyone who does it.
Would you consider any other reality TV or documentaries?
I don’t think about things like that. But if I was offered something and it felt right to me then maybe I’d do it.
What advice would you give to anyone in a similar position to you or with a loved one who’s very sick?
People dealing with loved ones who are ill – you’re all superheroes because I know how hard it is to get through that. And anyone who is dealing with grief, you’ve got to try and deal with it in the best way that feels right for you. Grief is so much bigger than I ever thought it was. There’s not a box for grief. You can feel different emotions and feel things at different times, so you’ve just to ride it out – that’s all I can say. Sometimes in five minutes I can feel all different emotions – happy, sad, angry.
Have you had counselling?
On the show I did counselling, and making the show was counselling for me, because I went on so many different groups and I had to talk about it. I had to face my fear and actually talk about what I was going through. So I think doing the documentary in itself was massive counselling for me.
Do you have counselling now?
No. I just feel I’m a good speaker. I do open up and say how I’m feeling about things.
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