Let me be honest here for a second: I love old things. I just do. I often joke that I was born in the wrong decade. I think that people used to live in a simpler time and put a lot more time and effort when they created things. With all of that said, I feel like hipsters have taken their love for old-fashioned things to an extreme level. They use them ironically and in a way that makes a statement about rejecting societal norms and the way that technology has advanced us into being conformists.
But, honestly, doesn’t it feel a little bit like hipsters have ruined so many good things for us? Like an old-fashioned crystal whiskey tumbler. I love those things. They’re beautiful and well made and single malt tastes so much better when it’s sipped on form one, but now they are considered to be a hipster.
Maybe that is too harsh. Maybe we should be thanking the hipsters for reviving these wonderful old-fashioned things and bringing them back again with a vengeance.
The truth is that people either love hipsters or hate them, but either way you’ll have to agree that a stereotypical hipster usually uses a few of these old-fashioned things, whether it’s for better or for worse.
It is my personal belief that flannel should be reserved for pajamas and lumberjacks, but nowadays when you see a man wearing a flannel plaid shirt, you cannot assume his profession based on what he is wearing because that flannel-wearing man may, in fact, be a millennial. If you’re not entirely sure if you have come across a lumberjack or hipster it’s best that you keep reading this list to see if you can spot another one of these old-fashioned things on them. If so, chances are that you have spotted one.
24 Cosby Sweaters
The “Cosby Sweater” is a chunky, ill-fitted, thick sweater with a ridiculous pattern. There are usually multiple colors in the pattern and kind of looks like the sewing machine threw up on fabric. The hipster wears this in an “I don’t care what I wear because I don’t subscribe to society’s typical standards of beauty” type of way, but I must say that while the reject social norms, they certainly must be warm while doing it.
23 Big Chunky Glasses
There is this photo of my dad when he was 25 and he is wearing this largest and thickest glasses known to man. Now, if you think that he chose to wear those glasses on purpose you would be highly mistaken. Back in the day, they did not have the technology to make nice, small and thin glasses for very bad eyesight. But these days Hipsters are wearing big chunky glasses for fun. Not only that, but some of the people wearing them don’t even have a need to wear glasses. What a world!
Today the quality of cameras on phones are so crisp and clean. The digital cameras that you can buy capture photos that are so perfect and beautiful that the pictures that you can take and develop almost look better than real life. But the Hipsters are not going for amazing quality and are not really concerned with optic zoom. Hipsters are going to be going for the classic and old-fashioned Polaroid camera. I wonder if they also shake it, shake it, and shake it like a Polaroid picture.
21 Vinyl Records
Vinyl records are nostalgic for those who grew up in the era, but Hipsters are too young to have been around in that era so there is no nostalgia for their love of Vinyl. While we all know that sound quality has truly been enhanced as technology has made advances, Hipsters will pass on the mp4s and mp3s and even on CDs to find the non-mainstream music that they love on a record. Although, I will say that Vinyl Record sleeves do make for amazing artwork.
20 Bikes without gears
It seems that anything that has advanced to make things easier for us is the kind of stuff that Hipsters will shun. If you’re a hipster, chances are that you’re going to have a bike and show off how environmentally woke you are by using it, or at the very least be seen with it. But that’s not quite enough. You’re also going to have to reject bikes with gears. I mean, why would you want help getting up hills or moving faster? Gear-less bikes that look like your grandpa would have ridden it is the perfect hipster transportation choice.
Cardigans are great office wear. They’re a great thing to have on hand to throw over your blouse when it’s summertime and your office manager has decided that the only way to combat the heat is to make it winter indoors. But cardigans usually give off too stuffy of a vibe for use outside of the office, unless you’re a hipster. If you’re a hipster then you’re probably wearing it ironically to protest the idea of “the man” and working for “the corporation.”
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The typewriter died with the age of the computer and printer when people realized that they needed a new and easier way to fix typosTheey keys often got stuck together and changing the ink strips was a real pain. But of course, Hipsters wouldn’t be caught dead writing their Novella or their poetry on anything else. After all, what are you doing it for if you are not doing it for the aesthetic.
17 China dishware (mistmatched, of course)
There is nothing that sticks it to societal norms as much as taking a symbol of posh high society and turning it into the everyday. If you head over to the house of a hipster for tea (loose leaf, of course) you’re just as likely to be served it out of some quirky ironic mug as you are a nice china tea cup that they got from a thrift store, which they will make a point of telling you. They won’t have bought the set, of course, because that would be too mainstream.
16 Knitted hats
Sometimes even when the sun is shining and the weather outside is perfectly warm, you’ll see people walking around in a knitted beanie pulled over their ears as if they are trying to keep in the warmth and stave off the cold. Yes, this does not make sense. Yes, they are probably making their head sweaty. But you cannot stick it to societal norms without breaking a sweat, I suppose. They refuse to let the weather define their fashion choices.
While you see an animal that has been stuffed, a Hipster sees art that speaks to their very soul. This trend has been popping up more and more as Hipsters are filling their homes with taxidermy. Is it a way of saying that we are all puppets being made to conform and look a certain way? Is it a statement that they reject the Judea Christian concepts of life after death and are using stuffed creatures as a way to represent that? Or, is it just another wacky trend that makes them “different” and “unique”? We’ll never know.
14 Straight edge razors
Razors may not have changed very much in a long time, but we have made a few great advancements: they’re less dangerous, easier to use, and get a closer shave. All of those things seem pretty awesome to me. But the hipster uses the straight edge razor because they can. Because it’s different. And because they love to embrace old-fashioned things. I really hope that they are getting people who know what they are doing to shave them, or at least watch a dozen YouTube videos before they attempt it themselves.
13 Handmade soap
Making soap is a process. Making good smelling soap is even more of a process, which is why soap has widely become a factory created product. It’s more productive, less time consuming, and it means a lower price-point for the consumer. Of course, why would a Hipster want to give money to a greedy corporation when they could pay 10 times the amount to get handmade soaps instead? And they are for sure to be selecting ones with quirky packaging or scents. They even have their own handmade soap, scented with coffee, bacon, and craft beer. That sounds about right.
12 Ironic t-shirts
Nothing makes a statement quite like a t-shirt. Listen, people have been using the t-shirt as a poster to say something about themselves for years, so it only makes sense that Hipsters would be doing this as well. They can proudly display that the thing that best represents them is an ironic message that basically says “I do not participate in your society.” It’s cool, hipsters; we get it. We’re not offended. You do you.
Bow ties look complicated to tie. They also look uncomfortable. But I do have to say that bow ties do look really good, if not pretentious. Of course, you’re not going to catch a hipster with one of those clip-on ties that are easy to add to an outfit. They are going to go for the real deal that will take them approximately 14 YouTube videos and at least 23 expletives before finally getting it right and being able to tie a semi-decent bow.
10 Giant headphones
Hipsters reject the nice earbuds that come with an iPod. They wear the giant headphones that cover half of their heads, because they take their music seriously. Seriously enough that there is no way that they would subject their carefully crafted playlists of non-conformist and non-mainstream music to earbuds, which are not noise canceling and do not have superior sound quality. I know, it’s confusing, but don’t worry, it’s just a hipster thing. You wouldn’t get it.
On the opposite end of the sound quality spectrum comes the boombox. While, yes, having headphones and music on your phone is the polite way to consume music and respect the people around you, a boombox is the absolute perfect way to shove your taste of music down the throats of the people in your direct vicinity and force them to listen to the poor sound quality of cassette tapes. It also weighs a lot more and is less convenient to take with you places, but it looks cool….right?
8 Exaggerated Mustaches
Facial hair is one of the many trademarks of the hipster. While it can range from big beards, to carefully trimmed and neatly kept beards (both of which would have beard oil anyway), facial hair is a crucial way for a hipster to make a statement. And when it comes to the mustache, the hipster is not going to be seen with a clean, corporate-looking mustache: the bigger, the stranger, the better. They have their mustaches exaggerated and styled in an almost comical way.
7 Vintage luggage
Vintage luggage has been becoming a trend with hipsters lately. Luggage has really made headway lately in becoming more durable and made for hefty traveling. Vintage luggage might be much more fragile and delicate, but they certainly do look rustic and beautiful. The leather on vintage luggage is soft like butter and the dents and scratches just give it character. Of all the old-fashioned things that hipsters use, this one is the one that I support the most. Go for it, hipsters. Embrace it.
6 Wall antlers
While they are not necessarily promoting hunting (although I’m sure that they could easily list all the benefits of hunting locally and farm-to-table foods), having antlers on their wall is a pretty common thing for hipsters. Although they usually are not just a decoration. They can easily be used as a coat hook or as a wine bottle holder. The antlers also let people know that the hipster is connected with nature and connected with the world and is more related to the deer than with society.
5 Knitted scarves
A hand knitted scarf is a hipster staple…even if it is warm outside. A scarf may seem like a piece of fabric that is meant to keep the cold winter wind off you and keep your neck nice and cozy, but that is simply just not it. A knitted scarf is actually a statement a statement that you are not a slave to weather dictating your fashion choices. Of course, if you do decide to ask a hipster where they bought their knitted scarf, you’re going to get a look and then they will proceed to tell you how they got the handmade (aka not store bought) knitted scarf.
Funky matchbooks are an absolute must for the best of Hipsters. Whether they are smoking cigars, cigarettes, or lighting a candle, they’ll choose matches over lighters any day. Lighters may be quick and easy, but hipsters are not the kind of people to shy away from something that might take a little more time or effort. They want to stand out and be different and embrace the things of yesteryear that we have so quickly forgotten. Side note, the funkier the matchbook that they come in, the better.
3 Old fashioned whiskey glasses
Those big old clunky whiskey tumblers are actually gorgeous and something that should be revered. Even though they go against the new sleek modern designs that glassware seems to be doing, I just love them and prefer drinking my single malt scotch from them. Hipsters have taken note of how wonderful these tumblers are and have taken them for their own. It’s super classy. It’s super old school. It’s something that your grandfather would use.
The fact that people still wear suspenders today when belts are a real thing amazes me. The design concept feels a little too flawed for me; either the suspenders would be at risk of slipping off your shoulders or they would be tight enough to dig in and be uncomfortable. On the flip side, you could easily just put on a belt to keep your pants up without fear of it slipping off. But of course, hipsters do not wear the suspenders for sensibility. They are simply looking to make a statement and to be “different”…together.
1 Mason jars
I will never understand the need to use a mason jar for everything. Mason jars are great for jam and for pickling things. Mason jars do not need to be used for cups and mugs and vases and storing everything. They really don’t. Hipsters, however, seem to be able to find many uses for mason jars. They can, and do, make mason jars into everything. So much so that the whole mason jar thing has caught on. It’s funny how that works. Hipsters reject the norm and the trends so much but then end up creating trends as they go.
References: Buzzfeed, ThoughtCatalog, EMGN
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