New Year’s Eve is like marmite – people tend to either love it or hate it. However, just as Christmas can cause feelings of unease, for those who suffer from social anxiety it can be especially difficult, thanks to the huge pressure to mingle with others.
“The prospect of spending time in public with groups of people can leave you worried about what you’ll say to others and a fear you’ll embarrass yourself,” says Mindset Coach, Kamran Bedi.
According to the Mental Health Foundation, in one year alone* there were 8.2 million cases of anxiety in the UK. Many Celebrities including Olivia Buckland, Dr Alex George and Peter Andre have all opened up about the realities of mental health.
Kamran describes anxiety as “a physical response that you feel in your body,” but says “it’s usually generated from your thoughts and state of mind.”
And he explains that “the key to feeling free from anxiety is to learn ways to have more positive influence over your thoughts – it’s a bit like having a superpower.
“The experience can be private as your thoughts are internal. So you don’t have to tell anyone what you’re thinking or how you’re thinking. This can really go to your advantage as you actively use your mind to feel less anxious.”
Here are Kamran’s three steps:
Step 1. Listen to your ‘superpower inner voice’
We hear our thoughts internally through inner chatter and dialogue. What we hear or say in this personal space influences how we feel in our bodies. Use your inner voice to help you feel calm, reassured, in control and less anxious.
Try this now…
- Hear your inner voice internally saying ‘I am calm’. Repeat it slowly and clearly three times.
- Turn the volume up on your inner voice so you can hear your thoughts in a calming and reassuring tone.
- You could also try, ‘I am in control’, ‘I can relax’, ‘I am confident’. Really hear and feel the words to experience how your thoughts can help you rapidly shift how you feel within.
- You can use your inner voice anywhere at any time without anyone knowing what you’re saying to yourself.
Step 2. Do some ‘body double visualisation’
For many people their inner thoughts will be very visual with lots of images and even mental-movies that they watch and see inside their head space. Visualising can again help you to improve your state of mind and reduce anxious thoughts or feelings.
Try this now…
- Imagine a confident version of yourself. Think how you would stand, walk, talk, what you would wear and how you would dance. Add any further detail.
- Imagine this confident body double stood in front of you. Then take a few more minutes to build up this confident version of you. Make it vivid, real and colourful.
- When you start to feel the confidence of your body double, mentally step into this body and feel that confidence flowing through you.
- At any time, you can imagine this ideal version of you that you desire, and then mentally step into that version to access the state of confidence.
Step 3. Combine the two in dance
Let’s now combine your inner voice and visualisation, and mentally rehearse a confident version of yourself that’s dancing in your mind at a New Year’s eve party.
Try this now…
- Hear the music in your mind, see yourself dancing and hear your inner voice saying ‘I can do this’, ‘I can let go and enjoy myself’.
- Keep seeing yourself dancing, having fun and being free.
- Shift your thoughts from anything that could go wrong and that leaves you feeling anxious, to thinking about all the fun and joy that you could have
- Keep repeating this – the more you do it, the more it can help you to improve how you feel within.
Takeaway tip: Remember, it all starts in your mind with your thoughts. Developing a confident and calm state of mind can improve your new year and day-to-day life.
Learn more about anxiety, mindset and practical tools to eliminate anxiety from ‘The Anxiety Antidote’ by Kamran Bedi, available now.
[* Data collected in 2013]
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