Psychologist reveals how childhood trauma can show up in adulthood

Are YOU showing signs of childhood trauma? Psychologist reveals 14 ways the experience can emerge in adult life

  • Dr. Lalitaa Suglani is a Chartered Psychologist based in Birmingham 
  • Also creates content online about mental health topics, sharing it on Instagram
  • In a recent post, she discussed how childhood trauma may show in adulthood
  • READ MORE: Psychologist reveals 9 ways abandonment issues can show up

A psychologist has revealed 14 ways childhood trauma can show up in adulthood – including not trusting yourself to make decisions.

Dr Lalitaa Suglani, a chartered psychologist based in Birmingham, shared the information in a post on Instagram, where she has more than 110,000 followers. 

In the post, she said experiencing childhood trauma while growing up can have an ‘enduring impact and can creep right into adulthood; your relationships, career and how you navigate everyday life’. 

Dr Lalitaa added that childhood trauma ‘can be subtle and nuanced, or even so routine that it seems almost normal’.

Dr Lalitaa Suglani, a chartered psychologist based in Birmingham, has revealed how experiencing childhood trauma while growing up can have a significant impact on the rest of your life (stock photo)

She explained: ‘Knowing how the trauma has shaped their lives may be difficult, but understanding what has happened can offer a path to healing and inner peace.’

She continued: ‘Healing is a process and looks different for everyone. 

Dr Lalitaa reveals 14 ways childhood trauma can show up in adulthood

1. You strive to be perfect and overthink everything. 

2. You are fearful of failing. 

3. You blame or shame yourself for your past choices and mistakes. 

4. You overly worry about what others will think about you. 

5. You don’t trust yourself to make decisions.

6. You suffer from constant negative self talk that you believe to be true.

 7. You struggle with self compassion and self-forgiveness. 

8. You constantly criticise and are hard on yourself. 

9. You seek external validation to feel accepted. 

10. You struggle with always feeling anxious.  

11. You are hypersensitive to criticism from others. 

12. You are fearful of change and uncertainty.  

14. You believe you are not worthy and never good enough. 

15 You can find it hard to take compliments.

‘It is not about pointing fingers and blaming our attachments, but perhaps to develop self-awareness and understanding to then make choices to support your needs. 

‘Things that can help are to identify your unmet needs, understand anger, check in with yourself, create self-care habits, use your emotions as a guidance system and identify what you need to soothe in the current moment.’

Listing the 14 ways childhood trauma can show up in adulthood in her post, Dr Lalitaa started with striving to be perfect and overthinking everything.

She then added being fearful of failing and blaming or shaming yourself for your past choices and mistakes to the list.

According to the psychologist, other ways childhood trauma can show up in adulthood include worrying too much about what others will think about you and not trusting yourself to make decisions.

Further ways she included in her post were suffering from constant negative self talk that you believe to be true as well as struggling with self compassion and self-forgiveness.

Dr Lalitaa also added constantly criticising and being hard on yourself, and seeking external validation to feel accepted to her list.

The final ways included in the round-up of 14 were struggling with always feeling anxious, being hypersensitive to criticism from others, and being fearful of change and uncertainty.

Finally, she said, other ways childhood trauma can show up in adulthood are believing you are not worthy and never good enough, and finding it hard to take compliments.

Making an important point in the post’s caption, the psychologist added a personal message.

She wrote: ‘I went through life not realising how I showed up in the world was a direct consequence of my childhood trauma as I never acknowledged it as “trauma” and this is why it’s so important to understand your past.’

Many people replied to the post, sharing their experiences with the signs the psychologist had spoken about

People took to the comments section to share their feelings about the signs outlined in the post, with one writing: ‘Wow, every single one of these I said yes to!’

Another agreed, adding: ‘That hits home.’

And another commentator wrote: ‘Your caption is so helpful Lalita and yes, childhood trauma can be subtle and nuanced.’

However a further respondent shared a more optimistic message, revealing: ‘So good to read this list and be able to say, “not any more!” to the majority of them and, “hmm…sometimes!” to a couple doing the work has set me free, thanks for these posts which have been an integral part of my growth.’

Read more: 

Psychologist: This is what the three main text message styles say about your personality – from a fear of abandonment to hypersensitivity 

How needy are YOU? Psychologist reveals the 4 attachment styles – and they all have roots in your childhood 

Are YOU heading towards burnout? Psychologist reveals the four signs to look out for 

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