A WOMAN has completely transformed her life after ditching her daily drug and booze binges, declaring: “I was destined to die or life in jail.”
Ainsley Loudoun said her life spiralled out of control after getting hooked on alcohol and drugs.
The 28-year-old, from Kilmarnock, Scotland, became depressed and first tried to take her own life at the age of 14.
But she turned her life around after attending regular meetings and embarking on a 12-step programme.
She told the Kilmarnock Standard: “I spent my life from a very young age seriously depressed.
“Age 14 was my first suicide attempt. I lived in utter darkness from a very young age and I found drink at a very young age too.
“I thought it was normal the way that kids drink, and for a while it was normal.
“I lived my life in total chaos. There was never any normality – I couldn’t hold a job down, there was violence and I was getting into trouble at 16 and narrowly avoided going to jail.
“The drinking continued and developed into cocaine use too. My life just completely spiralled.
It was either going to be jail, I killed myself, or recovery. Those were the options I had left – and so I chose recovery."
“I was drinking all the time and missing work so I was losing jobs.
“It was either going to be jail, I killed myself, or recovery. Those were the options I had left – and so I chose recovery.”
Ainsley has been in recovery for the last two years and has been able to hold down a job for the first time in her life.
She added: “My life has been completely transformed because of this programme and I’m now holding a job down and there’s been no violence.
“Before, there wasn’t a day in my life where I’ve woken up and I haven’t wanted to die. But I’m grateful for every single day now.”
She now wants other people to seek the same help she received and thanked Cocaine Anonymous for assisting her on her road to recovery.
Ainsley added: “There is a way out. Life is amazing.
“For someone that was destined to die or spend the rest of their life in jail I know that if I can change then this can work for anyone.”
Cocaine Anonymous says anyone can become a member as long as the person wants to quit the drug and attend meetings.
They said: "We are a fellowship of cocaine addicts who meet together to share our experience, strength and hope for the purpose of staying sober and helping others achieve the same freedom."
YOU’RE NOT ALONE
EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide.
It doesn't discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society – from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers.
It's the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes.
And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women.
Yet it's rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now.
That is why The Sun launched the You're Not Alone campaign.
The aim is that by sharing practical advice, raising awareness and breaking down the barriers people face when talking about their mental health, we can all do our bit to help save lives.
Let's all vow to ask for help when we need it, and listen out for others… You're Not Alone.
If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:
- CALM, www.thecalmzone.net, 0800 585 858
- Heads Together, www.headstogether.org.uk
- Mind, www.mind.org.uk, 0300 123 3393
- Papyrus, www.papyrus-uk.org, 0800 068 41 41
- Samaritans, www.samaritans.org, 116 123
Contact the Samaritans
If you have been affected by any of the issues in this article contact The Samaritans on 116 123. They are available for free at anytime.
Or email https://www.samaritans.org/
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