DEAR DEIDRE: I WENT Christmas shopping alone this year since my sister got her new girlfriend.

We are twin girls and did everything together.

We are 31.

She has taken up with this woman of 40, who was a friend of our mother but now has my sister in her clutches.

They have now started sleeping together.

My sister had boyfriends before.

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I can’t help but resent this woman because she split up my twin from her last boyfriend and took her away from the rest of the family too.

Every time my sister wants to do something with us as a family, her girlfriend says no.

My sister has spent almost £500 on this woman’s Christmas presents and they’ve even had matching tattoos done.

I worry her girlfriend is controlling her.

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DEIDRE SAYS: She may be, but as your sister is an adult, she can choose whichever partner she likes.

There isn’t much you can do other than listen to her and pick up the pieces if things go pear-shaped.

If her girlfriend is using coercive control, you can suggest your sister gets in contact with The National Domestic Abuse Helpline (nationaldahelpline.org.uk, 0808 2000 247).

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