I'm a parenting expert – my discipline hack works on kids of all ages

Parenting expert reveals tried-and-tested discipline hack that ‘deescalates tempers’ in children of ALL ages – even teenagers

  • Nik Bowers is an author and former principal based in Texas 
  • She opens up about her experiences and shares parenting advice on TikTok
  • Bowers recently detailed her tried-and-true technique for disciplining children

A parenting expert has revealed her clever discipline hack that ‘deescalates tempers’ and works on children of all ages — especially teens.

Nik Bowers, an author and former principal based in Texas, has worked with students from preschool to college for more than 20 years and specializes in middle school teaching. 

The mom of two daughters opens up about her experiences and shares parenting advice on TikTok, where she has more than 11,000 followers.

Bowers recently detailed her tried-and-true technique for disciplining children that puts them in control of their punishment. 

Nik Bowers, a parenting expert and former principal, has worked with students from preschool to college for more than 20 years and specializes in middle school teaching

In a recent TikTok video, the Texas mom detailed her tried-and-true discipline hack that works on children of all ages 

‘You are going to love this parenting hack, and you are going to need to save it. No matter how old your kids are this will work,’ she began her nearly minute-long video.

Bowers advised against doling out a punishment in the heat of the moment, which can cause anger and resentment. 

She said the first thing you should do when disciplining your child is ‘pause, step back, and think it through.’ 

‘Then you’re actually going to give them a choice in the consequence,’ she explained before listing some examples. 

‘You can say, “Well, do you want to do four hours of chores or lose your driving privileges? Do you want to miss this party or do you want to lose technology for a weekend?”‘

Bowers noted that when you give your child a choice in consequences for their behavior, they are less likely to argue with you about their punishment. 

‘When they do complain about it or whatever it’s like, “Okay, well, you chose,”‘ the parenting expert said.

‘It actually can deescalate the situation because just that small amount of choice isn’t a bad thing. 

This parenting discipline hack will deescalate tempers. I love giving chouces. Teens di not lije cinsequences but it hits different when you can choose.#discipline #consequences #parenthacks #momsoftiktok #dadsoftiktok #parentingteens #parentingteensishard


Bowers advised giving your child a choice in their punishment. ‘You can say, “Well, do you want to do four hours of chores or lose your driving privileges?”‘ she explained 

‘When they do complain about it or whatever it’s like, “Okay, well, you chose,”‘ the parenting expert said. ‘It actually can deescalate the situation’

‘Give it a try and let me know how it goes,’ she concluded. 

Bowers has been candid about her childhood and how it shaped her as a mother. 

In her upcoming book, Raising Beautiful Messes, she helps other moms better understand themselves in order to build strong relationships with their daughters. 

She opened up about the moment she realized her parenting style had to change in another video shared on TikTok

Bowers explained she was in her first year as a middle school principal when she had a meeting with a student who was bullying another girl and her mother. 

The former principal recalled how the mom started cursing at her daughter and calling her names, which reminded her of her own childhood. 

‘I recognized her contempt, her language, her body language, just everything that she was doing, and then I also recognized the fear in that child, the embarrassment, and the longing for her mom to see her,’ she said. 

‘I knew I had been that daughter many many times in my life, but I also knew as a mom that I had responded that way too, and that made me sick to my stomach.’

The experience made her look inward at her past childhood trauma and better her parenting, so her daughters would no longer fear her.  

‘That was the day that I decided the cycle would end with me, and I would do what I had to do in order to have an amazing relationship with my children,’ she said.

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