My boss gets drunk and kisses me but I am too scared to say it makes me uncomfortable

DEAR DEIDRE: WHENEVER my boss gets drunk at work events, he kisses me.

The next day he acts like nothing has happened. I feel really uncomfortable and confused about this.

I’m a 30-year-old straight guy, and I live with my girlfriend.

He’s about 40 and is married with kids.

The first time it happened, we were out celebrating a team account win.

He gave me a big bear hug and kissed me on the cheek, saying “I bloody love you!”.

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It felt a bit off, but I put it down to too much prosecco.

Then it happened in the pub after work, and again at another team event.

The third time, he actually took my head in his hands and gave me a big smacker on the lips, then laughed it off.

He doesn’t do this with anyone else. Does he think I’m gay – or is he?

I’m worried my colleagues will think something is going on between us.

However, I’m too scared to say anything to him in case I embarrass him or lose my job.

It’s making me dread going to after-work events and now I try to avoid being alone with him at work.

Maybe I’m just overreacting.

DEIDRE SAYS: You’re not overreacting. Perhaps he’s gay, or perhaps he’s just on a power trip.

Either way, his behaviour is inappropriate.

You don’t want him to kiss you but, because he’s your boss, you feel you can’t say anything.

He’s abusing his position. This is sexual harassment.

If ever you feel able to, or the right moment does occur, talk to him when he’s sober and ask him not to do this again.

Alternatively, do consider reporting him to your company’s HR department.

They will have policies to deal with this.

Keep a record of what’s happened and when, so you can use it if necessary.

Contact acas.org.uk for support. Its site has a section on sexual harassment.

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