My bridesmaid asked to bring her fiancé to the bachelorette weekend my sister is paying for so it can ‘double as their vacation’
- An American bride took to Reddit to get opinions on the heated exchange
- She shared screenshots of the texts where the drama went down
- READ MORE: I was paid by a stranger to be the best man at his wedding
A bride has been left shocked after her cheeky bridesmaid invited her boyfriend to the bachelorette party – and expected her to pay for it.
The confused bride from the US took to Reddit to get opinions, and shared four screenshots of messages in the bridesmaid group chat, where the drama went down.
It was shared to the r/ChoosingBeggars forum, which is described as ‘a subreddit for posting screenshots, pictures, or stories of people who are being way too picky when begging for things’.
In the chat, the bridesmaid said she wanted her fiancé to come along to the hotel – which the bride’s sister is paying for – so that they can use the hot tub and other facilities, adding: ‘This weekend kind of doubles as our vacation.’
However, she got a short shrift from the bride’s sister who wrote back, saying: ‘You should not bring your partner to crash a bachelorette party. It’s just rude.’
In the post, she shared four screenshots of messages in the bridesmaid group chat, where the drama went down
The stunned bride responded ‘I really don’t think you should bring your partner to a bachelorette party…’
The conversation kicked off with the bridesmaid claiming that someone else – presumably the bride – had told her it would be fine to bring her fiancé along to the bachelorette.
She said she wanted to ‘double check how many rooms there are’ and added ‘it doesn’t matter if we have our own room but I just like having him next to me and wanted to go in the pool and the hot tub and everything with him.’
Adding ‘that weekend kind of doubles as our vacation.’
She then went on to ask for the details as soon as possible including what hotel they were staying at.
She wrote ‘I’m very everything taken care of as soon as I can type of person. It’ll all go on my calendar.’
The stunned bride’s sister responded ‘I really don’t think you should bring your partner to a bachelorette party…
Still determined to get her beau to the bachelorette, the bridesmaid said ‘So you’ll pay for a whole room for just me and I can’t share? And I just said it’s not at the party’
‘I haven’t picked out a hotel yet or the rooms, but they are very expensive. I am not going to subsidize you and your boyfriend’s vacation.’
The bridesmaids tone quickly turned snappy as she replied ‘Fiancé, and it’s not to the party just the hotel room.’
Not backing down, the bride’s sister said ‘Let’s just change it to partner. You should not bring your partner to crash a bachelorette party. It’s just rude.
She added: ‘[the bride] is too nice to tell you otherwise. Fortunately I am not.’
Still determined to get her beau to the bachelorette, the bridesmaid said ‘So you’ll pay for a whole room for just me and I can’t share? And I just said it’s not at the party.’
The furious woman replied: ‘I absolutely would not pay for a whole room for you, no. If you want to sleep in your own room with your partner and spend time with him at the hotel instead of the girls, you can pay for your own room.’
Rather than apologizing, the bridesmaid frostily replied: ‘Okay that’s why I was asking not stating. If it was my own room I would have brought him, that was the point of this conversation.’
Keeping her cool, the bride’s sister added: ‘Apologies for the confusion. Everyone is not going to get their own rooms. I am looking into 2 rooms to share right now, but the cost is around $600 for the two rooms for the two nights, so I haven’t pulled the trigger yet.
The Reddit post has over 800 comments, the majority of which are siding with the bride
‘I’ll let you know before this weekend which hotel I decide on so you can get your own room.’
However, the bridesmaid was still confused, saying she ‘didn’t know if there were more rooms or not’ and her partner won’t be coming if there are shared rooms.
The bride’s sister said: ‘As long as your partner isn’t with you, you are free to share a room with the girls. If you bring your partner, you are free to get your own room. Hope that clears things up.’
She later posted on the thread to clarify that some of the bridesmaids have financial difficulties so that she is paying for the hotel to ensure that her sister has a great time and everyone can be there.
‘The bridesmaids know that I am covering the cost of the hotel, but I failed to make it clear that we would be sharing the rooms,’ she said. ‘I thought this would be assumed, but we all know what assuming things does.’
The Reddit attracted more than 800 comments, the majority of which sided with the bride and her sister.
One husband wrote ‘My wife couldn’t pay me to be anywhere near the bachelorette party. Like go away and have a good time. Don’t invite me and don’t feel like you need to contact me unless you REALLY need/want to or its an emergency.’
Reddit users are siding with the bride, asking ‘why in a million years would you ever say that to someone?’
Someone else joked ‘This is going to be the most awkward weekend ever, can I come? I’m going to need my own room’ with another replying ‘I’m going to need a room also, but my partner will be joining. It’s really our honeymoon, hope you don’t mind subsidizing.’
One Reddit user said the whole situation seems a ‘little odd’:
‘I’m more stuck on the fact she wanted to bring her partner on a bachelorette party. Is she not able to be away from him for a couple of days to hang out with the girls – the whole reason the trip was planned?
‘Is she expecting him to hang out with everyone while you do girly things? Is she going to insist he come along?
‘If she does bring him, assume she will take most of the time to be with him and ditch the gang. If she has paid for anything where finances are combined, I wonder if she will ask for money back if she decides not to go and spend time with her partner.’
However, not everyone thinks the bridesmaid is being unreasonable
Another said ‘I would bet my entire life that if the fiancé was going to a stag weekend with his mates, this type of arrangement would never even be a consideration. Even if (biiiiig if) he did want her there, he would never ask the groom/best man’
However, not everyone thinks the bridesmaid is being unreasonable – one user wrote:
‘Based on the first few texts, it is totally unclear how many rooms are being gotten, so the ‘beggar’ is wondering why it’s OK for her to get a free room alone, but it’s not ok to bring her boyfriend/fiancé.
‘Whoever [not sure if Bride or MOH] is covering the cost of 2 rooms; of which all the girls will be sharing space, which isn’t made clear until later.
‘If OP is planning to split that cost between the group, it’s completely unclear from any of those texts. ‘Beggar’ seems completely fine being told no, it’s just both of them clarifying their points back and forth after that I don’t see this as being choosy, or being a beggar
‘I see it as a confused person not having all the information, and being fine with being told no.’
They added: ‘Now why would she bring fiancé to a bachelorette party. That’s a completely different craziness.’
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