‘My fella loves bonking in public toilets – the grottier the better’

Sex in public toilets is my boyfriend’s thing.

He gets a kick out of taking risks. No grotty council amenity or department store facility is safe when he’s around. He thinks it’s edgy to pull me into women’s toilets when no one is looking.

He bundles me into a cubicle and then gets hugely turned on when he can hear that someone has entered after us. From sandy bogs at the seaside to portables in public parks, the man thinks the grottier the better.

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I swear he seeks out locations so that he can tick them off a secret list. Over the summer we went to Spain and Greece, and we had a fumble on every flight. I live in fear of being caught but he insists it’s “just a bit of fun”. Isn't it?

JANE SAYS: It’s not a bit of fun if you don’t enjoy it. He may have a private agenda regarding sex in as many smelly places as possible, but you don’t have to go along with his fetish.

Remind him that, according to Section 71 of the Sexual Offences Act 2003, it is an offence to indulge in sexual activity in a lavatory to which the public has access.

If caught, he and you could be looking at a fine and/or up to six months in prison. Stand up for yourself and tell him that you’re done and walk away. This guy is no good for you and sounds as if he’d benefit from professional counselling.

New man has share phobia

My new boyfriend is an odd one. We’ve just moved in together and he doesn’t like to share. He deliberately buys food he knows I don’t like, so he can have it all himself. It’s the same with booze and even toothpaste. How do I get him to grow up?

JANE SAYS: There are teething problems in a new set up. But your guy needs to hear you’re not his rival; you’re not out to pinch his sweets. What part of “couple” doesn’t he understand?

Insist on establishing middle ground re meals and funding. Set up a joint account for food, utilities and basics, and both put in the same each month. Is he happy living with you?

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