DEAR DEIDRE: MY mother is a narcissist and chronic liar.
It has taken me years to see past her lies, her tricks and her jealousy.
She is so cunning and sly, I wonder if I should just cut off all contact with her.
I’m a 28-year-old single woman. Things got so bad between us that I moved out to live with my best friend.
When we meet she puts me down, criticises my appearance and then gives me her usual sob story that nobody cares about her.
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My mother is 62. She accuses me of upsetting her when she is the one who is uncaring and unkind.
The problem is, she’s still my mum and I love her.
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DEIDRE SAYS: It does sound as though your mother has a narcissistic personality.
No matter what you say or do, she is unlikely to change.
She knows you love her and uses this to manipulate you.
The relationship is toxic, and breaking off or at least limiting contact might be the best option.
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Talking to a therapist could help.
Also contact Stand Alone which supports adults estranged from family members (standalone.org.uk).
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