Save articles for later
Add articles to your saved list and come back to them any time.
First, it was Carrot Man. Then, it was the Darth Vader busker. Next, it was Water Bottle Girl. Now, it’s the Voice of Flinders Street Station.
Goooooood afternoon readers, meet Laurence Hewson – Melbourne’s latest local legend whose penchant for whimsical upbeat proclamations and joke-filled riffs has amused Flinders Street Station commuters and sparked a cult following on social media.
He can see you: Metro announcer Laurence Hewson says its easy to spot the camera phones popping up to capture his latest zinger.Credit: Chris Hopkins
“It’s those little things that make Melbourne the weird and wonderful place that it is,” he says. “If I managed to find myself with those people as my peers, I’m honestly very happy with that.”
The 34-year-old started permanently on the platform microphone as a station assistant just three weeks ago.
An Instagram account awash with his eccentric announcements covertly filmed by train travellers gave him his title and shot to almost 40,000 followers in a little more than a week.
When The Age spoke to him at Melbourne’s iconic rail hub on Wednesday, a mum stopped her dash to make a train for a photo while her kids watched.
One passer-by fist-bumped him under the departure clocks facing Swanston Street.
“Here he is! The star of the show!”
Laurence plays in a rock band, but some of his greatest comedy hits now include: “The Upfield line is shutting its doors, this train must simply go … like a Persian rug in a warehouse, it is simply walking out the door.”
You may also hear him say: “Please don’t crowd around the doors with the people trying to disembark the train. Most of them are Victorians and have never seen a rugby scrum in their lives.”
Laurence Hewson outside Flinders Street on Wednesday.Credit: Chris Hopkins
Or this: “The doors are locked. You can’t save these people now. Their time has come. Just let them go.”
Or this number: “We hope you have a good journey home, and if it’s your turn to host Christmas this year, we hope the weird in-laws from NSW have already cancelled the trip down to Melbourne.”
“That one erupted,” Laurence says of his latest seasonal quip.
“I have to admit I do write a bit of the material. Some of it’s off the cuff, but I don’t want people to get really bored of me really quickly.”
He also dishes out some useful advice.
Those passengers who are “alone, confused and scared”, looking for ever-elusive platform 13, should walk past the station escalators on platform 10 “like you don’t owe them a damn thing”.
“And when you walk past those escalators, like the magical land of Narnia, platform 13 will reveal itself to you and the Sandringham service will arrive at your feet,” he says in one viral clip.
In another, weary workers heading home on a Werribee service are advised to “swing by your local Coles and pick up yourself a roast chook bag because it’s easier than cooking”.
Laurence Hewson works his magic on Platform 10.Credit: Chris Hopkins
Laurence admits his first supervisor initially encouraged him to “tighten it up a little bit” but he soon found passengers were thankful and paid more attention to his safety announcements when he started “going a bit off-script”.
“It snaps people out of autopilot a bit,” he says. “They’re like: ‘did I just hear that correctly?’ Then they’re a little bit more aware of their surroundings because it’s not the snooze-fest that it was before.”
Laurence’s main passion is music, and he partly took the Metro job to make sure his weekends were free for gigs. Plus, he loves trains and interacting with people. He used to be a postie, removalist and an emcee.
The best part of his day is seeing his amateur comedy make time-precious and stressed commuters happy.
“Those reactions are the ones that mean the most – the people who were just like, ‘I’ve had a shit day and this was a nice moment.’”
Laurence Hewson started at Metro in August before becoming a platform announcer permanently three weeks ago.Credit: Chris Hopkins
Laurence wasn’t completely surprised to see videos of himself pop up on social media, but clips racking up hundreds of thousands of views on TikTok within days did take him aback.
He hopes the extra attention helps promote his band Sordid Ordeal, and says those taking videos of his zingers aren’t as covert as they think.
“I challenge anyone to look at a locomotive like that and not be impressed,” Laurence says in another viral clip as a train rolls past. “What a fabulous specimen of German engineering – so silver, so flat, so beautiful. Fantastic. I got the right job.”
Judging by the smiles of commuters bustling past, few would disagree.
Get the day’s breaking news, entertainment ideas and a long read to enjoy. Sign up to receive our Evening Edition newsletter here.
Most Viewed in National
From our partners
Source: Read Full Article