Etiquette expert reveals the posh way to eat cake -from how to handle dry versus moist bakes to the correct cutlery to use

  • London-based content creator Lucy Challenger makes TikTok etiquette videos
  • The 38-year-old recently made a video demonstrating the posh way to eat cake
  • She explained that the way you eat will depend on the type of cake consumed
  • Dry cakes can be torn into bitesize pieces by hand, moist eaten with cutlery 

An etiquette expert has revealed the posh way to eat cake – and it all depends on the kind of bake you’re eating.

Lucy Challenger, 38, who is based in London and Berkshire, is the founder and CEO of high-end Mayfair agency Polo and Tweed, which sources employees for uber-wealthy clients.

She is also a TikTok creator, and has garnered more than eight million likes for her videos which teach Gen Z social media users the essential manners and etiquette they need to fit in with the upper echelons of society.

In a recent video, Lucy demonstrated the proper formal way to eat cake, in a British setting, explaining: ‘Depending on the type of cake you are served, will depend on how you eat it.’

She continued: ‘If you are served a dry cake, such as a pound cake, you would tear it into small bitesize pieces with your fingers, and then neatly eat with your hands. 

Lucy Challenger (pictured) is a businesswoman and TikTok content creator who often makes videos about etiquette. In this video she tackled the proper way to eat cake in a formal setting


In the video, Lucy explained that there are different ways to eat cake, depending on what you are eating 

‘A moist cake, for example, a cheesecake, you would use a fork and a spoon if required.

‘With ice-cream cake, for example, you would use the fork and the spoon. The fork is used to hold cake, and the spoon is then used to cut and convey the food to your mouth.’

And the etiquette rules don’t stop there. Things are further complicated if the dessert is accompanied by any sauces, for example, custard, for which you would use a spoon.

However, the fork could be used for eating berries, which are often served alongside custard. 

When it comes to cake, pie, or crepes served à la mode (with ice-cream on the side) they can be eaten with either fork or spoon, or both.

 For hard desserts, like poached pears, you would switch how the utensils are used.

Lucy explained: ‘The spoon would be used for cutting, and the fork would be used to bring the food to your mouth.’ 

Birthday or layered cake, which is served standing upright, should be turned on its side using a fork and spoon, then either implement can be used to eat it.

Eating cake is not as straightforward as it may initially appear, if you are eating it a formal setting, where there are some specific rules to follow, as outlined in the video 

Lucy explained that scooping food with a fork is not normally acceptable within a British formal dining situation, but that it is fine to scoop when using a dessert fork

The etiquette expert then went onto introduce another piece of cutlery to the cake eating arsenal: the dessert fork, specially shaped to assist with both cutting and spearing food.

‘To eat my cheesecake, I take my dessert fork,’ said Lucy. ‘I cut into the cheesecake, separating a small bitesize portion.

‘And now depending on the density of the cheesecake, I spear the cheesecake with my fork, and then place it into my mouth to eat.’

A cheesecake that’s less dense can be scooped from the top.

‘Remember typically in British formal dining, we don’t scoop with a fork, however, it is perfectly acceptable to scoop using a dessert fork.

‘In between bites, you can place the fork neatly down by the side of the plate, then you can continue to enjoy your cheesecake when you’re ready.’   

A number of TikTok users took to the comments section to express their opinions on the video, some praised the advice, while others revealed that they weren’t the best at etiquette, but enjoy Lucy’s content

The detailed instructions struck a chord with etiquette-loving viewers, who complimented Lucy on the video.

One wrote: ‘Oh how lovely, some of my friends from law school are having a dinner party tomorrow, I will be hosting and desert will be cheesecake.’

Meanwhile another joked: ‘I find the most challenging part about cheesecake is having time between bites to set the fork down.’

And a third added: ‘Quintessentially British.’ 

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