DEAR DEIDRE: I’M frustrated because my girlfriend refuses to share her sexual fantasies with me.

It feels as if she doesn’t trust me and I also wonder how we will improve our sex life if she won’t be open and honest with me.

She’s 28, I’m 27, and even though I know she was adventurous with her previous boyfriends, she refuses to talk about it.

I want to please her more than they did, but she says she feels uncomfortable talking about it.

I want her to know everything that I like and for her to do more with me.

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I want our sex life to be better than anything she has experienced before.

How can I get her to open up and try more things?

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DEIDRE SAYS: People tend to use the word “fantasies” differently and you may be confusing the issue.      

  You mean things you would like to try, while she may mean her inner sexual desires, which can feel very private.

Instead, when you are making love, ask what touch or position she’d enjoy next.

Bit by bit you’ll discover what works for her and can suggest what you’d find especially thrilling.

You can ask her if there is anything new she would like to try with you.

But don’t rush this sexual discovery or she may feel pressured.

I’m sending you my support pack 50 Ways To Add Fun To Sex, which will provide you both with plenty of ideas

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