Victory for mother told to remove decorations from son's grave

Victory for grieving mother, 29, told to remove decorations from grave of son, seven, who died after an asthma attack as council votes to review rules

  • Sharna Andrews has fought Gloucester City Council on their cometary rules 
  • The council has now agreed to review its rules around decorating grave sites 

A grieving mother has won a reprieve to stop the removal of decorations from the grave of her son, who died of an asthma attack aged seven. 

Sharna Andrews hand-painted a wooden fence in rainbow colours to place around the grave of her late son, Harry-Lee Andrews-Tomlinson who died in February 2022. 

The 29-year-old said the colourful addition to his resting place at Gloucester Cemeteries and Crematorium helped the family to cope with their loss because it matched Harry-Lee’s ‘bright and happy’ personality.  

But just a few months after the fence was erected, Ms Andrews received a letter from Gloucester City Council saying it needed to be removed as it failed to ‘comply with the rules and regulations’. 

She said her eight-year-old daughter, Zofia, who decorated the fence with her as a means of processing their grief was ‘upset for days’ after they received the letter last month. 

Sharna Andrews pictured with her son Harry-Lee Andrews-Tomlinson who died in February 2022

Sharna Andrews hand-painted a wooden fence in rainbow colours to place around the grave of her late son, Harry-Lee Andrews-Tomlinson who died in February 2022

The 29-year-old said the colourful addition to his resting place at Gloucester Cemeteries and Crematorium helped the family to cope with their loss

Harry-Lee Andrews-Tomlinson died in February 2022 after suffering an asthma attack

The grief-stricken mother vowed to fight to save the fencing and spoke at a council meeting last week, where the local authority agreed to review its rules. 

‘It’s been very emotional’, she said. ‘It was unfair that I was put in that position before when I still haven’t come to terms with the death of my son and I hope I’m never in that position again. 

‘It’s just a waiting game for the review now but it’s the start of the beginning and hopefully it ends the right way.’

Ms Andrews will be able to keep the decorations on Harry-Lee’s grave while the review is underway. 

In the meeting, Deputy Leader Hannah Norman confirmed deed holders such as Ms Andrews who have received letters to make changes to grave sites will not have any legal action taken against them.  

‘I’m very thankful they took the rules into consideration – and I hope when they assess the rules and regulations they think of the impact on the families’, Ms Andrews added. 

‘In the meantime we can do what we want with his grave.

The grief-stricken mother vowed to fight to save the fencing and decorations around her son’s grave 

The family are now looking to decorate the little boy’s grave for Christmas while the council’s rules are reviewed 

Ms Andrews decorated the grave with the help of her eight-year-old daughter, Zofia 

‘We can decorate it for Christmas. Harry-Lee loved getting involved in decorating, especially at Christmas. Now he can’t do that with us, we’re taking the decorations to him. Just because he’s gone doesn’t mean everything he liked should be gone with him.

‘I can already picture his face and how excited he’d be for us to decorate.’

Gloucester City Council said the rules and regulations for Gloucester Crematorium had been in place since August 2014 and were ‘in line with those in place in other cemeteries and graveyards around the country’ prior to the latest ruling. 

They added that all families are asked to sign up to these at the time of burial to stop boarding, kerb sets or chippings on graves unless ‘approved by a stonemason’.  

A spokesperson for Gloucester City Council said: ‘We will be undertaking a review into the rules and regulations around cemeteries in Gloucester to ensure they still meet best practice.

‘The current rules and regulations for Gloucester Cemetery have been put in place since August 2014 and are in line with those in place in other cemeteries and graveyards around the country.

‘All families are asked to sign up to these at the time of burial and copies are then sent to them to retain.

‘The rules do not allow families to place boardings, kerb sets or chippings on graves unless they are approved by a stonemason, as it allows the grounds to be maintained without risk of damaging any plastic or wooden surrounds placed there and protects the health and safety of workers and visitors.’

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